7 Days Till XDay
by mrs-ishida
Summary: TalaxReixKai,Bryan? It's Xday, and Rei has to choose between running away with his new lover Tala, or staying to try and work something out with Kai. Everything hangs on whether or not Kai can finally except Rei's feelings, and maybe even his own!
1. 7 days to go

Hey! I'm back! I know there's a manga called X-day, but this doesn't have anything to do with it. This is another story basically all about love and rejection, which links into my life a lot. Sorry this is only an intro, but not a lot can happen this early on in the story!

I hope you stay with me throughout the seven days!

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There's something unfulfilling about loving someone with the same gender as yourself, because at the end of the day, unless they are gay, you know that you are the one who's gonna end up getting hurt. And you know something? That day always comes sooner than you'd like to hope. The continuous looming dread, of X-day.

Sunday- 7 DAYS TILL X-DAY

My name's Rei Kon and I have a secret. I'm in love with my team mate, Kai.

Okay, so you can judge me all you want now, but I really don't care. I know I shouldn't have let myself get this carried anyway with him, but it just happened, and it's not the type of thing you can just forget about.

I came to the park today to meet my friend, Tala, but it doesn't look like he's gonna show, so I might as well go home. Tala doesn't usually show up to our dates (that's a joke by the way, nothing between me and Tala), so I don't know why I'm so surprised anymore!

I guess Tala and I don't really seem like a good match, but you'd be amazed by how well we get on. You see, we both have something in common, and that's our love interests. They're both prominently male!

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"Yo, Kon! Quit zoning out and get over here!" Tala called from across the park. I turned my head in disbelief; Tala had actually showed for once. "What are you waiting for Lucky Rei?"

"Say that to my face scum-boy!"

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Tala handed the cash over to the women- who continued to eye us both questioningly. A kind of 'are they or aren't they' glare. She handed me the key to our room.

"You're room 204," she said, still glaring at us. "Will you be requiring breakfast?"

"No ta, love! We're only saying a few hours! Thanks anyway, miss." Tala said trying to deepen her fears about them. I stepped on his foot and Tala yelped. "Off then, miss."

I waited till we turned the corner, and then we both started laughing uncontrollably.

"One day Tala, you're gonna say something like that and someone's gonna come asking after us. Can't pretend we weren't here then!"

"Oh shut up you old nag!" Tala straightened up and took on a more serious tone. "I've gotta get my kicks somehow."

"So Bryan still not come round?" I asked innocently.

"Whoa! Stop there!" Tala's head darted around the hall. "What if someone heard you say that? It's not like they would know who we and Bryan are!"

"Lets get to the room then."

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"Wow! Look at the size of this bed!" Tala said flopping back onto it. "Care to join me?"

"In your dreams, Tala." I placed my stuff on the arm chair and flicked on the T.V. "I'm spoken for" I laughed lightly as Tala pouted.

"Kai wouldn't mind if you had a quick fling with me before you two got together!" Tala laughed.

"Who says me and Kai are ever gonna get together?"

"You did the instant you told me…" Tala stood up on the bed and pushed his hands to his heart "…I love Kai, Tala. And I don't know what to do about it!"

"You're supposed to help me- not mock me!" I yelled, throwing myself onto the bed and tackling Tala down. Pinning him under me.

"That hurt Lucky Rei!" Tala whimpered sweetly.

"Who are you to talk anyway? Bryan's claimed your heart, I never mock you."

"Oh grow up Rei. Don't be so sensitive." Tala spat back at me. I'd usually get angry when some one talked back to me, but I'd forgotten how much Bryan affected Tala.

"I'm sorry, Tala." I said, de-mounting him.

"It's cool Lucky Rei." There was a pause, then Tala asked. "Would you like Kai to know?"

"Know what?" I rested my head on the many pillows and closed my eyes, comfortable next to Tala.

"How you feel, stupid!"

"Well, yeah. I guess it would lift a weight off my chest."

"Then how about we make a pact?" Tala said, beginning to fall asleep as well.

"What sort of pact?" I replied, yawning.

"That next Sunday, we tell Bryan and Kai how we feel."

"What? But what if they reject us? We can't go back to being friends then." I asked.

"No, no, no. My pact is flawless." Tala sat up right and rubbed his eyes. "We tell them on Sunday, get rejected, get that weight off our chests, and run away together."

"Run away?" I knew inside that I'd been thing about doing that for a long time anyway, but what shocked me was… "Together?"

"Well why not? We're both gay! And after a rejection as huge as the one we'll face on Sunday, I'll think we'll need each other!"

"You're right." I sighed, and began to drift off to sleep. "But you don't get to touch me till then!"

"No fair!" Tala laughed. He flopped back down beside of me and pulled the duvet over us. "Till Sunday then, Lucky Rei."

"No," I muttered. "Till x-day!"

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Thanks for reading! Day two up soon! Please review and tell me what you think!


	2. 6 days to go

Hello! Welcome to chapter two! I'm actually afraid that not many people will like Kai in this story- after reading my plan though. I didn't really intend for Kai to come off as the evil character, he's just complex- lol! But then you would only pick up on this slightly in this chapter, so I don't know why I'm telling you now!

Anyway! I hope you enjoy this chapter, and please review!

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Rei turned his head at look at the clock on his bed-side table, but soon realized he wasn't at home. He turned round on the bed and came face to face with Tala. Rei groped around under the duvet and grabbed Tala's wrist, bringing it to his eye level to look at his watch. Tala twisted a little because of the harsh tugging on Rei's part, but soon fell still again.

"Shit. It's 11!" Rei jumped out of the bed and rushed a note for Tala. "Kai is gonna kill me! I'm late three days running!"

_Tala,_

_So sorry, but I had to go to school. I'll make it up to you some time, promise!_

…_.Rei!_

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Monday- 6 DAYS TILL X-DAY.

"Look Rei Kon, everyone else can manage to get to school on time, so why can't you? It's not like you live miles away is it? You live around the sodding corner!" The headmaster hit his desk sharply, which made me jump. "You were a model student once, what the hell happened?"

_Kai happened, asshole, but I can't tell you that. _

"I'm just a little stressed lately…" I've never been I good liar.

"No exams now, Kon!" He flopped back down into his leather chair and sighed. "Get out. Kai will take you to your lesson."

"But Kai is on duty tomorrow…?" I said.

"No he's not." Kai's voice cut into me like many tiny knives. He had the type of voice which you both feared hearing and longed to hear. "Come with me."

I stood frozen for a moment, not turning to face Kai. For some reason the pact with Tala made it harder to cope with Kai being around.

"I'm not gonna ask again!" Yelled Kai. He grabbed my shoulder and twisted me around to face him.

He looked at me questioningly at first- which soon turned to a look of confusion. My facial expression was hard to read for a person like him- I could tell. If he wasn't so dense, he'd know that I was near tears.

"Lead the way, Kai." I muttered, and Kai swept out of the office- with me walking after him.

We left the staff corridor and Kai suddenly stopped.

_Here it comes. Here coming the beating._

"Is there something wrong, Rei?" Kai said calmly and without turning around. My heart beat a little faster than it did preparing to get beaten up.

"No. Not really." I stuttered. "Nothing you should worry about anyway."

"But when you are so late into school, it makes me worry…."

_Oh my god! He's worried about me! That's more than I ever hoped for!_

"…about what you've been doing at night." Kai finished, turning to face me.

_Wishful thinking, Rei. You're gonna get beaten up._

"I've just been a little down I guess…" I said. Kai raised an eyebrow and frowned. Only then did I realize my mistake. "F-forget I said that. It doesn't matter. I won't be late…"

"You shouldn't be ashamed for your feelings, Rei." Kai interrupted with.

_WHAT?_

"I-I'm not!" I began to step back from him, fearing he had guessed.

"At least one person will ask you how you are feeling everyday. You will always reply with 'I'm fine'. But when was the last time you felt fine when you were asked?"

"What are you on about?..." I asked, already knowing the answer. Kai simply watched me and waited. "I can't even remember."

_He actually cares, and no only that, he understands me! Maybe there is hope, a chance! He's gonna help me…_

"The school councilor is in her office today at lunch. I suggest you go and talk to her about this." Kai stated like an icy machine. I opened my mouth to protest, but he was already walking away.

"You'll a real bastard you know, Kai!" I yelled after him.

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"How was school then?" Said Tala, who was quite annoyed I'd left him alone that morning.

"Late again." I grumbled and sat down on Tala's bed.

"Are you feeling okay?" Tala asked- innocent of mine and Kai's conversation.

"I'm fine."

_Shit! That's what Kai meant! He didn't mean that I was ashamed of 'feelings', but how I felt! _

_He means that I shouldn't be afraid to tell someone how I feel!_

_But does that theory apply to feelings of affection as well?_

"Yo, earth to Rei!" Tala yelled, jabbing my ribs sharply. "You say you're fine, then you freeze up like that! What's the matter?"

"I'm so confused and lonely. I don't understand why I do what I do anymore. Why am I failing at school?" Once I started, there was no going back, and I poured out my heart to Tala. "I've been living like this for far too long now! It's not healthy! It's not normal! Wanting someone I can never have, and who can only reject me. Kai can never make me happy, so why do I love him so deeply? Why am I walking around, continuously drowning in his icy shadow, full of pain and sorrow?"

Tala shifted over on the bed and hugged me from behind. His long, pale fingers against my chest felt calming, and the weight of his head on my back was strangely relaxing.

"It's gonna be okay. Everything will work out." Tala whispered; his hot breath tickling the back of my neck. "And if it doesn't, it doesn't matter. We will always have each other."

I leaned back onto Tala, taking us both back down onto the bed.

"Sleep well, Tala. And thank you." I muttered softly, twisting round to be on my side, and letting my head and hands relax onto Tala's chest.

"S'cool," Said Tala, letting his hand rest on the back of my head. "Till x-day."

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Sobs. Damn Tala and Rei are cute! Anyway, thank you for reading, and please review!


	3. 5 days to go

Hello! Someone asked last chapter if Kai was a teacher. Well, no he isn't. Sorry, I should have made this clearer- Kai is a prefect.

Well, welcome to chapter three and I hope you enjoy it!

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"Rei Kon. Rei Kon? Is he absent again!"

"No Sir, I'm right here…"

"You mean you actually turned up on time? Well this must be a dream!"

"No, Sir."

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Tuesday- 5 DAYS TILL X-DAY

There's something about class that everyone hates, and it's not always the work. When you have to sit on your own for hours, with no conversation except the voices in your head; you start to get a little bit more insane with each passing day. No one ever notices it happening, because it happens over such a long period of time. I n fact it's been happening since kindergarten.

However, one day, all those little pieces of collected delirium, will take their toll.

And that's when the pain starts…

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"Rei Kon! I'm glad that you turned up today, but please pay attention!"

I slowly lifted my head from the desk and rubbed my tried eyes. How the hell could I concentrate on this crap?

"Now class, take out your note books and copy the examples down."

"No." I said.

"What was that Rei Kon?" The maths teacher yelled from his desk.

"I said no. I'd rather not." I managed to keep calm, even though my hands trembled wildly.

"Get out then." He shouted, causing the first row of girls to jump. "I knew there was a catch to you being here…" He added under his breath.

"Thank you, Sir."

"You shouldn't be so cocky, Kon!"

_Why do I care? I'm leaving on Sunday. I'll tell you what I think of you and I'll do what I like!_

I walked down the maths corridor and to my locker.

_Tala was right. If we're going on Sunday, why do I need to go to school? It's not like I have any friends to say goodbye to!_

I opened my locker, and began packing my bag with anything which a wanted to keep.

"Going somewhere?"

I jumped and slammed my locker, to find Kai resting against the next locker down.

"No. I'm not planning anything!" I stumbled.

_Oh shit… _

"Planning something? Now I never said that!" Kai almost smiled at my look of horror. "I just wanted to know why you aren't in maths!"

"And why aren't you in maths?" I said, trying to sound impressive.

"I took it last year. This is a free period for me."

_Stupid, smart Kai! Stupid, smart… sexy…_

Kai knocked my shoulder back and I stumbled onto my locker. The next thing I knew, Kai had an arm around my back.

"Sorry." His arm was warm and his grip was firm. I felt embarrassed that Kai was holding onto such boney ribs. "I didn't mean to push you that hard."

"It's okay…" He looked up at me and I noticed just then I was totally pinned. "…Kai."

"You look pale, Rei. We both know you're not well, so just get to a doctor."

"Don't worry. It's nothing." I tugged his hand off me, and slipped away from him.

"I need to understand what's going on." Kai said, still looking at where I used to be.

"You will." I picked up my bag and started walking. "In a few days."

"Stop, Kon."

"What?" I asked, stopping and turning around.

"I'm not letting you out of this school, so I don't know where you're going." Kai said amazingly calmly.

"How will you stop me?" There was a long pause, almost as if Kai had taken a drag of some imaginary cigarette.

"By force." He smiled and almost laughed. "An anorexic boy like you shouldn't be able to put up a fight."

"I'm not anorexic!"

"You might wanna check the scales when you get home, Kon."

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"6 and a half stone?" I sighed. "Maybe he's right…"

"What did you say?" Tala called from my bedroom.

"Nothing." I replied.

_I first thing I'm doing when I get away from here is sorting this out!_

_I wonder where we are going actually!_

I walked back to my bedroom, where Tala was sorting through my clothes- only to find he had my tennis outfit on.

"Tala…"

"What! I think I look good!" He swung the bat around in front of the mirror for a while. "Why did you quit tennis?"

"It was too boring." I paused, still in the doorway. "Where are we gonna go?"

"Tokyo!" Tala laughed and began going though my drawers again. "Where else?"

"Well, how can we afford Tokyo? Flats there cost a lot."

"Rei, you worry too much! An old friend died last month and left her flat to me in her will."

"Her? Died? I'm sorry…"

"Don't be. I didn't like her like that, but she did. That's why I got the flat!"

"You don't just leave your house to some crush…"

"Well she did, so drop it!" Tala snapped. "I'm gonna change back now."

"Sorry," I turned to leave and pulled the door semi- closed as I walked away.

_Everything is going wrong. _

I went into the kitchen where Tala had made me pasta. Without even thinking about it, I scraped it into the bin.

_Wait a minute Rei. You do this everyday! When was the last time you ate except pop tarts for breakfast? _

I walked back to my room, but Tala wasn't finished yet. For some reason I peered though the gap I'd left and found myself watching him change.

_His ribs stick out the same as mine do! I'm just over reacting- it's what Kai wants!_

Tala slid off the top and shook his hair out. He stood still looking into the mirror for a while, and then looked down at his hands.

Even I could feel his depression when I saw him like this.

Agitated, boney fingers ran down his face in place of the tears Tala could not cry.

And just as suddenly as he had began acting this way, Tala snapped out of it, and started changing again.

_I keep forgetting about Tala. But not even I can reach him…_

_There's nothing I could do._

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Thanks for reading! I'll update soon! Please review!


	4. 4 days to go

First, I'd like to say how upset and shocked I am about the London bombings. I live near London, and that day was very pressing on everyone I know. As I use the underground often, I'm particularly scared by what's happened. I don't know how much you Americans know about his attack, but it has deeply upset everyone. I hope people don't let their fear and sadness turn to misplaced hate.

Sorry this has taken so long to update, and I hope you enjoy this!

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"Going out to the shops, Tala." I called back into the house, before closing the door. "Make sure you're alive when I get back…"

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Wednesday- 4 DAYS TILL X-DAY.

It was one of those days which remind you why rain is linked with sadness.

The rain came down heavily from a sky swelling with grey, and touches of black. The air was thick and the wind made it so the water hit you hard.

Flicks of water would fly up each time my feet hit the pavement, and dampness crept up my trousers. But I didn't let it bother me. I needed to get home as quickly as I could.

There are many reasons not to run blindly in the rain. The main one being- you're likely to hit into someone. Which is what I did.

Without warning, I slammed into something hard- and went flying forward with them under me. We hit the ground with quite some force, and sent water flying up all around us.

"You little bas…" They began. "…Rei?"

My head rested in his chest with my arms and legs spread either side of him. Slowly I pulled my head up, and came face to face with…

"Bryan!" I jumped off of him instantly and took many paces back.

_Shit! I'm dead! I'm SO dead! I ran into Bryan! He's gonna kill me for real!_

"How's Tala?" Bryan asked calmly, still on to pavement.

"What?" I replied with shock.

_He's not gonna kill me. And he wants to talk about Tala?_

"He's staying with you right?" Bryan said getting up. "How is he?"

"Errr… He's fine, I guess…"

"I was a little surprised when he told me, but they do say love is blind right?" He rubbed the back of his neck and gave an awkward smile. "As long as Tala is happy, I guess I shouldn't complain."

"Hey, I think you misunderstand…"

"It feels weird without him at home. I suppose I'm a little jealous of you." Bryan said sadly.

"Me and Tala aren't seeing each other!"

"It's okay, Rei. Don't bother lying to me, I understand. I support you two!"

"No, Bryan! You really don't get it!" I said urgently. "Me and Tala are close, but not like that! He just moved in cause we're good friends! Nothing more!"

"You sure?" He asked, raising an eyebrow.

_Where the hell did he get this idea? _

"Sure!"

"But… Tala said that… when he left, that it was because…" Bryan paused and took a long look at me. "Well, I'm sure you'll find out Rei, even if you deny it now."

_What an idiot! Tala likes you, retard! Wish I could just tell you!_

"Bye then, Bryan. Maybe you could come round some time."

"I think Tala would rather I left you alone."

_MORON!_

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I opened my door and walked into my flat. After placing the shopping down on the floor, I walked to my room to check up on Tala.

But Tala wasn't in bed anymore, let alone in the room.

"Tala?" I yelled. "Where are you?"

"He's in here, Rei."

_Kai?_

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Kai was sitting calmly on the sofa with his legs apart. Between his legs, sitting on the floor, was Tala- who was still in his boxers. Kai had one arm around Tala's shoulders, and the other hand had a knife- pressed tightly onto Tala's neck.

Tala opened his mouth to talk, but Kai pressed the knife in sharply.

"Let him go you bastard!" I shouted, still in the doorway.

"You never told me you and Tala were so close, Rei!" Kai said softly.

"We're not like that! You don't understand!"

"But you are living and sleeping together. Even missing school to be together!"

"It's not like that!"

_Please don't hurt him. Please let him go! Tala!_

"I must say I'm disappointed, Rei. Here I was, thinking something was wrong with you, when all along you just wanted to spend more time with Tala of all people!" Tala flinched I little at this, which Kai easily contained. "I mean if you're gonna go for guys, at least pick a real man."

"Oh, and I guess that you're a 'real man' then?" I said, forgetting that I did in fact love him for being a 'real man'.

"I'm worth ten times this pathetic…"

"No you're not, Kai! Now just let him go, or I'll…"

"You'll what?" Kai snapped, loosing his cool for the first time.

" Go Drigger!" Drigger hit Kai in the face before he'd even realized what I was gonna do. The force form the impact, sent Kai reeling back, giving Tala the chance to slip away.

Tala stumbled forward holding his neck, and into my arms…

_What is Tala doing? This is hardly gonna convince Kai that…_

"And there you go. Embracing just like the guilty lovers you are!" Kai shouted, rubbing a sore face.

"Why are you even here, Kai?" I asked.

"I just wanted to… I was…" Kai suddenly shot Tala an evil look and said. "But I found him! He was near-naked in your bed!"

"Get out." I gripped onto Tala a little harder. "NOW!"

Kai swept out and slammed the door behind him.

"Are you okay Tala?" I calmly whispered to the shaking boy in my arms.

"I'm sorry." He muttered.

"Why? You didn't do anything wrong."

"I'm so sorry, Rei. Forgive me!"

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Thanks for reading, please tell me what you think!


	5. 3 days to go

This chapter may come as a bit of a surprise!

Just to warn you, next Sunday (not tomorrow), I'm going on holiday for 2 weeks! (I hate holidays!) So I can't update during this time. But I'll work really hard so I can get another update posted before I leave! Maybe two if I have the time…

But moving on- I hope you enjoy this chapter and I'd be very happy to hear feedback from you- so please review! Thanks.

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Tala turned over and let his hand fall across my chest. I tried not to think about it and just get back to sleep, but I couldn't.

Yesterday, I'd told both Bryan and Kai that me and Tala weren't a couple. I guess looking at us from the outside, we must seem like an item; but we're not. We're just close friends…

At least I think we are…

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Thursday – 3 DAYS TILL X-DAY

"You're going to school!" Tala yelled when he saw me in my uniform. "What the fuck?"

"Look, I wouldn't bother, but I need to see Kai." I sighed and buttoned my blazer. "I don't want to leave things as they are between us!" Tala flashed me a look of pure disgust, and got back into bed. "Tala, I don't want the next time we speak to by my confession!"

I swung my school bag over my shoulder and slipped on my shoes.

"Don't you hate him? Not even just a little- for what he's done?" Tala said sitting up.

"He got over excited. He's just upset that I made him believe something was wrong with me." I sat back down on the bed next to Tala. "He's just worried about me I guess…"

"That blazer really doesn't suit you." Tala smiled.

"What's that got to do with anything?" I snapped.

"You should stick to Chinese clothes. Western clothes make you look like someone you're not."

"Funny you should say that!" I laughed briefly. "Once Kai told me that this blazer suited me. Made me look like I had some 'dignity'."

"What a bastard!" Tala growled.

"Yep. He's a bastard all right." I giggled.

"Then how could you love him?" Tala begged. I spun my head round in shock at the way Tala said this. He sounded hurt and desperate, even though his face was smiling.

"I saw Bryan yesterday."

"Really! Where? How was he? Did he mention me?" Tala asked quickly.

"He's fine. He misses you." I thought for a while. "In fact, he was really cut up that you left."

"Oh…"

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Kai wasn't in his form room, the toilets, on the field, in a club or anywhere!

I sat in my empty form room- with my head on my empty desk- and had pointless day-dreams, wishing everything was better.

I wanted Kai to hold me. I wanted him to press his chest up against my own, tight enough so I could feel his heart beating. To feel his arms resting gently across my shoulders, and his hands clutching my back firmly. I wanted to feel his hot breath dance across my neck-line, and hold the back of his head gingerly as he did so. To be pushed up against walls and desks, thrown around, and yet never leaving Kai's embrace…

…**There's something unfulfilling about loving someone with the same gender as yourself,…**

"Having a good dream, Kon?" I bolted up-right coming face to face with Kai again. "I didn't think people could actually smile in their sleep."

"I was just…" I started in vain.

"Tala's really that good, is he?" He smiled, and sat on the desk in front of mine. Our gaze locked, with caused me to blush. "Blushing now? Well I'm so sorry for interrupting your…"

"Shut up, Kai! Just for once in your life shut up and listen to someone!" I yelled.

Kai sat in a stunned silence and waited for what I had to say.

"There's nothing between Tala and I. We're just good friends which live together. Lots of friends do live together, Kai!"

"What bull shit!" He said, calmly facing away from me. "Even if you claim to be 'just friends', I'm sure Tala doesn't see it that way." He turned to face me again and actually smiled. "You're an easy person to like, Kon."

_What the Hell is going on, and where is Kai?_

…**because at the end of the day, unless they are gay…**

"Err…thanks, I think." I stumbled, slowly turning red again.

"No one would run to you like Tala did, if they didn't love you."

_I think Kai's right, even though it don't want him to be. That would explain why Tala wanted to run away with me and become my lover. I'm so blind sometimes! Seeing how Bryan was yesterday, he would never reject Tala, so why would he want to run?_

"Silence upsets me, Kon."

Kai launched himself forward and sent us both crashing though many desks, till we hit the wall at the back of the room. My back was pressed against the wall, with Kai sprawled on top of me- his head resting against my own.

…**you know that you are the one who's gonna end up getting hurt….**

"That hurt like shit, you bastard! Why the f…"

With our foreheads already touching, Kai slowly moved in closer. My hands automatically tried to grasp the floor beneath them in shock, but couldn't.

Our noses slid in opposite directions, and a warm hand held the back of my head firmly. I could feel his musky breath on my lips, which opened in reaction to this titillation.

I waited for contact, but it never came.

…**And you know something?...**

"You really would have kissed me, Kon?" Kai stood up and sorted out his dislodged blazer.

"Well, I…"

"I know you're gay, I'm not a fool. Most people can tell by looking at you. But to be desperate enough to except a kiss from me! What the fuck?"

"I'm not desperate! I wouldn't just let anyone kiss me!" I shouted in my defense. Kai just snorted.

"So why me then? It's not like…"

…**That day always comes sooner than you'd like to hope….**

_Sorry Tala…_

"I love you."

"What?" Kai took steps back and tripped on a desk, sending him crashing to the floor.

"I love you, not Tala. I've always loved you!" I said surprisingly calmly.

"Why?"

_So under all that 'alpha male', ego bull-shit- Kai's actually got shit self-esteem._

"Because I do." We sat in an awkward silence, which was broken when Kai suddenly clasped his hands over his mouth, and ran out.

_You don't actually have to throw up over it, Kai._

I let myself go limp, and slid down the wall.

_It's fucked. Everything's fucked._

_I couldn't even wait till Sunday… X-day. _

…**The continuous looming dread, of X-day….**

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Thanks for reading and please tell me what you think about this!


	6. 2 days to go

Hey! At this point I'd like to remind (or just tell- can't remember if I've said this or not) you that they're all around 18 in this fic. This is my last update till after my holidays, so i tryed REALLY hard to improve my writing style and produce a great chapter to make up for it.

Today I spent all of my holiday money on 6-10 of the Getbackers manga. My excuse was "At least I will have something to read when ever I'm bored."... but sods law always bites me in the ass...cause I read all 5 of them in 3 hours this afternoon cause I couldn't wait.

My self-control is really crappy.

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I sat in my living room facing the window,which was tall and old-still only single glazed. The flat was large but run down, and I had niether the will or the funds to change that.

I leaned forward slightly and let my forehead rest against the cool glass surface of the window.

I was lost. Not only within my own flat, but within my own head.

And this time, there was no one to find me again.

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Friday- 2 DAYS TILL X-DAY

"What's up, Rei?" Tala asked from behind me. I didn't turn to look at him. "I didn't hear you come back last night and I got worried. But then I kinda fell aslepp phoning around for you. Sorry about that. I seem really tried recently, even though all I'm doing is sleeping. Weird, huh?"

The coolness from the glass crept across my face and numbed my brain. I didn't want to have to think, but my mind just wouldn't stop working.

I wanted to stop working all together.

"Rei, has something happened?" I was dimly aware that Tala put a hand on my shoulder, so I pulled away slowly, making his out-stretched hand slip down my arm, coming to a rest at my elbow. He didn't move his hand away, and I felt invaded. "Where were you last night?"

Out of the corner of my eye, I stole a glance at Tala, who'd just got out of the shower. He had a towel wrapped around his chest and his red hair fell across his shoulders. He looked like a girl. Wet, helpless and concerned.

"Why are you acting like this? What the Hell has happened?" Tala's distressonly served to make him seem more like a girl.

"Get out."

"What?"

"I want to be alone." Each word was almost too painful to speak. I felt like this was the first time I'd ever spoken.

"I won't go anywhere until you tell me what's going on." Tala gripped his hand tightly around my elbow, but I didn't have the strenght to ull him away. I'd just have to push him away.

"I'm in love with Kai." There was a slight pause which created an uncomfortable atmosphere. Tala tensed a little. "Not you."

Tala too his hand away and I heard the front door opening a few minutes later.

_Good. I wanted him gone. _

I sat in the sinlence of my empty flat watching the people below go out their normel, daily lives- completely unafected by the pain I was feeling. I hated them. How I hated normal, happy people, who got married and had children.

I was the last Kon. The only male child to carry that name. I had to carry on the family bloodline and teach my children the ways of my people, so that we wouldn't die out.

But how can I carry on the Kon bloodline if the person I pine after can't have children?

Yesterday, after what happened with Kai, I was left lying on the floor. It was a girl from the class across the hallway that found me. She said she had a free lesson till the end of the day, and took me home with her.

She seemed quite innocent to look at- French I think she said. Matilda was her name- and after a while I recalled tat she was once a member of Barthez Battalion a few years back.

When she smiled at me- I forgot about Kai, and when she touched me- I forgot about everythng.

I'm not proud of myself. But at least I could now comfirm without any doubt that I wa gay. I had hated every minute being with her and not Kai. It felt dirty.

I don't understand why though. Kai has rejected me, so it wasn't like I was cheating on him or anything.

I was just cheating myself I guess.

My eyes priced and I blinked away any tears that I might cry.

_What do I do now? I've got no where to run away to and no one to go with, but can I really stay here and face Kai everyday?_

_I don't even know how he's gonna act when he sees me. I already know he's rejected my feelings for him, and throwing up was a hint that he hates me for it._

_I'm sorry. But I don't understand why I should be._

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The door opened and closed again, and this time I turned around- finding it was only Tala. He looked at me for a moment then walked into the kitchen- the air heavy between us even when we weren't in the same room.

I pushed my chair backwards and stood up. the ground below mt feet seemed to move about, and I ended up grasping at he window pane- agitated hands trying and failing to get a grip.

Just as I was about to fall, cold, boney fingers clasped around my ribs and guided me back down to my chair.

"I saw Kai," Tala said softly from behind me. "It's alright. We planned this anyway. If you still want to come with me, the train for Tokyo leaves on Sunday night. The flat has ben emptied and is completely ready for us to move in. I tink there some stuff for us too- like beds and cupboards and the kitchen is meant to be top of the range." Tala stepped into the newly made gap in-between the chair and the widow, and I looked up at him. "I never meant to hurt you."

"But you did."

Tala frowned and turned round to look out the window. He was wearing plain black trousers and a long white t-shirt, wit what looked like my school jacket on top. He'd gone to my school to find Kai.

"Did you ever stop to think that Kai is feeling that very same pain that I've inflicted to you?"

"No."

"He's kinda hurt, you acn tel just by looking at him." Tala turned to face me again. "But I don't think he's a lost case."

"It's a a lost cause, Tala. He was sick when I told him." I said bitterly. "He ran out with his hands over his mouth."

"Think what you like, but I think it's worth working on him." Tala said carefully, pain emitting from each word. He looked down. "He's the kind of person tat's never considered homosexuality before, so throwing it at him lie you did caused his shitty reaction. I think if you just gave him time to toy with the idea- he might actually give you a shot."

Tala quickly stumbled back into the kitchen and I just realized how much pain he must be in.

I stood up- swayed a little- and waled to the kitchen, to find Tala cying over the sink. He saw me and rubbed his eyes pointlessly.

"Did you ever like Bryan?" My question was frank, but at this point- the lying had to end.

Tala froze for a moment and looked down at his hands.

"Why do you always look at your hands when you're sad?" I continued. He dropped hi hands and turned to face me. "Why do you love me?"

"Being with you makes me feel alive. And no, I've never liked Bryan." He paused. "I look at my hands because..." Tala stopped suddenly and looked shocked. "How do you know that?"

"I've seen you a few times before."

"But I only do it when I'me alone!"

I said nothing to answer this and looked at him questioningly. He opened his mouth to speak, panicked, and ran past me out of the kitchen.

"Sto running away, Tala! That's not the way to deal with a problem!" I followed him out of the kitchen and into the bedroom, and found him sprawled out on the bed- crying into the pillow.

I'd never actually seen Tala cry before. I'd seen him try lots of times, but for some reason this was th first time he'd managed it, and it seemed like he was making up for lost time.

"Tala, I'm not worth it!" Any resentment I'd once felt towards him was forgotten like a bad dream, and all I felt when I looked at him was sadness. "Please don't cry."

Tala muttered something but I couldn't hear him.

"Pardon?"

"Where were you last night?" He rolled over and faced me. I sat down on the bed beside him.

"I was taken home by..." I started.

"The Barthez girl?" Tala said calmly.

"Err...Yeah actually. How did..."

Saw Miguel before Kai." Tala smiled as he recalled theire meeting. "He'd umped her yesterday morning and she didn't turn up to practice last night. He was worried so managed to get the key from her land lord, not expecting to be let in, but left when he heard you two 'talking' through the door." Tala actually laughed, which made me laugh too. "I think you pissed Miguel off a lot!"

"Tala wasn't the slightest bit upset with what I'd done, and seemed to understand she didn't mean anyting, just like I hadn't meant anything to her. Tala explained the word was 're-bound', and laughed the whole thing off. He'd stopped crying now and the air was calmer between us.

"I'm happy when I'm with you too, Tala." I smiled down at him, and he curled around me like a snake. "You make me feel alive too."

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Thanks for reading! Hope you liked! I'd love to hear what you think, so please review!


	7. 1 day to go

This is actually a very long chapter for me! Thank my new pocket computer! Writing on the move...

The main difference between this story and my other beyblade epic, 'In your prime, Rei', is that this is a more realistic portrayal of homosexual love. In this, it's only Tala and Rei- the two good friends- who are gay. While in the other one- everyone seemed to be gay. I tried to make it so this story would actually show what it was like to be a homosexual. This is why I've included the Miguel/Matilda and Tyson/Hilary story lines- showing everyone else is straight- and made Kai confused rather than excepting.

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I reached out for Kai, my fingers twitching and desperate. He looked back at me and sneered, he was disgusted by my intentions. He hated me and he didn't care about showing it.

There was a thudding sound and I was surrounded by the smell of blood and fear.

Copper fear on my trembling lips.

"How dare you feel you have the right to love me!" Feet stamped above my head and bright lights danced widely in my mind. Kai's eye's snapped open in front of my own, and jeered at me. "You aren't a woman. You may look like one, but at the end of the day- you're just some pathetic teenage guy. Why would I ever want you over a women? What could you, a member of the fallen house of Kon, ever offer a guy like me?"

Kai's eyes vanished and footsteps echoed. I raised my head in time to see doves flying up from gravestones, Kai's naked form obstructed by them both.

Hands grabbed at my own naked body and violated me completely. Kai laughed in the distance.

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Saturday- 1 DAY TILL X-DAY 

"Rei! Please wake-up, Rei!" Tala's panicky voice actually was quite a comforting thing to wake-up to after a nightmare like last nights. I moaned slightly and opened my eyes.

"What's up, Tala?" I asked, still sleepy.

"Nothing," He sighed and smiled. Tala was standing over me fully dressed. "It just looked like you were having a bad dream." Tala stepped back a little and pushed his hand behind his neck. "You were screaming 'stop' quite loudly."

"What time is it?" I rubbed my eyes and sat upright.

"Nearly midday." Tala sat down on the bed. "There's a party tonight, are you interested?"

"Party? Who's is it?"

"Funny you need to ask. It's actually Tyson and Max's, but I think that other girl is taking the credit."

"Hilary? Yeah, that sounds like her..." I laughed privately, as Tala had no idea about Hilary.

"You had no idea about this party? I thought you got on with Tyson and Max."

"I do but..." I slipped my feet out of bed and searched around for clothes. "Ever since I've been skipping school and spacing out, we've kinda stopped talking."

"Good. Tyson's an asshole and Max should have been born a puppy." I frowned at Tala, and slid on his black shirt and trousers to protest.

"Don't steal my clothes, you bastard!"

Tala grabbed me from behind and I laughed while trying to escape his hold. He finally managed to get his hands under my arms, and he playfully (yet meaning it!) tried to get the shirt off. We both laughed and he proceeded to tickle me- forcing to give him better access to the shirt.

I became aware of his warm breath on my exposed neck, and without realizing what I was doing- leaned back into his hold and closed my eyes. To answer this, Tala stopped tickling me and let his hands roam over my stomach- pushing the shirt upwards.

"Rei..." Tala moaned into my neck, his voice heavy with musky lust. My eyes snapped open- suddenly noticing what was happening. But I didn't pull away...

Tala traced circles into my chest, and started to plant kisses down my neck.

Tala had never kissed me before.

"You better stop that now, Tala. This feels weird." Tala quickly drew his hands out from under my arms. "I'm sorry- I shouldn't have done..." Tala muttered.

"Don't worry about it. I shouldn't have let you get started in the first place."

Tala didn't reply, and when I turned around he wasn't there- the bedroom door open.

I raised my hand up and gingerly felt the places where Tala had kissed me. I caught myself wishing he'd kissed me properly...

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It was dark by the time me and Tala got to the venue of the party. We'd taken Tala's crappy old Honda as we didn't have enough money for a cab. Okay that sounds a little odd- but trust me- if you'd ever gone pinion on that bike with Tala driving, you'd pay all the money you owned to go by cab instead.

And to top it all off- even though I'm actually gay- it's still embarrassing being driven around by another guy. The amount of wolf-whistles we got...

Tala swung his leg over the handle bars and pulled off his helmet, shaking out his hat-hair. For once he'd done his hair like a normal person, and for some reason it reminded me of Max's hair style- but it was slightly more swept back.

As I watched him- it seemed like everything moved in slow motion.

"Yo, Rei! Quit spacing out and get off!" Tala smiled and clipped his helmet onto a saddle bag. I slipped off the Honda and handed him my helmet. "Hey, your hair wrap..." To my utter dismay, Tala handed me my torn hair wrap- which must have got caught on the helmet. Tala just laughed as I fumbled around with my loose hair.

"What the fuck am I gonna do now!" I whined, getting really worked up about it.

"Rei, I like your hair down." He grabbed hold of some bags which were flying about madly and tucked them behind my ear, stroking my face as he did so. Tala had always managed to have a good calming affect on me. "Are you sure you can manage this party? You did nearly have a mental break down yesterday."

"So did you."

"But you're the only person I have to answer to..." Tala said worriedly. "You still haven't seen K..."

"REI! TALA!" Hilary collided into Tala and began clinging onto and stoking him like a dog. "You look SO cute with your hair like that! And oh my God! Rei!" She bounded from Tala onto me and tugged at my hair. "It feels so nice! What shampoo do you use?"

"Hilary, do you always have to act so shamefully?" We all looked up to see Tyson in the doorway to the house, arms folded, looking very green-eyed.

"Sorry if your girlfriend has to look else where, Tyson." Tala laughed, and grabbed Hilary off of me by her wrist. She screamed in shock as Tala twisted her round, to eventually bump into his chest.

_I forgot how much Tala hated Tyson..._

_But he really shouldn't play games with peoples hearts like this._

Hilary moaned a little (she was drunk if you couldn't already tell!), and tugged at Tala's shirt. My heart leapt when I noticed it was the same one I'd worn that morning.

"Tala..." Hilary raised her head upwards and rose onto tip-toes.

"Shit, Hilary! I was only jokin..." Hilary cut Tala off with a very drunken- yet scarily passionate- kiss. Tala's eyes jolted wide open and it looked like he'd frozen on the spot.

Both Tyson and I leapt foward at the same instant; he grabbed Hilary and I grabbed Tala. It was only after I'd grabbed him, I started to wonder why kissing Hilary should bother me anyway, and by the look on Tyson's face, he was wondering the same thing.

"Come on then you guys, you better get inside..." Tyson sighed. Tala seemed to snap out of it- and hastily started to wipe his mouth.

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Inside was practically pitch black- with trippy lights as the only light source. People lay around on the floor in small groups, drinking from various different bottles. Heavy metal music played loudly out of a number of speakers, a style I'd never been fond of. I looked back at Tala who was walking behind me- to find him smiling and nodding to the music.

_Stupid Russian, what an awful taste in music!_

I looked back a moment later, and found Tala had stopped following me. I searched around the room for him desperately, but it was too dark. I saw there was an open door leading to the gardenso I stumbled towards it, needing to get away from the light and music.

The garden was void of any other people and quite dim. I could still hear the music loudly- but I just felt better out here. I took a swig of the Alco-pop someone had passed me and wished it was something stronger.

"Hey, Kon. Didn't think you'd show," I instantly recognized Kai's voice and was unable to turn around. Tala's words before Hilary had showed up came back to haunt me. "Are you alright?"

"Err...Yeah, I'm fine."

"We've had this conversation," Kai sighed and stepped in front of me. "You're not fine are you?"

We both looked straight into each others eyes for a while, and I suddenly looked away, feeling awkward.

"I'm not fine...I-I'm sorry."

"Rei look...Everything's fine. We're friends, right! None of this matters..."

"Why are you still trying to talk to me?" I yelled still looking down- tears biting at my eye lids. "Why don't you hate me? Don't you at least resent me?" I found the courage to look up at Kai, to find him quite taken back. "I've done so many shit awful things to you Kai. I've told so many lies. Smiled when I wanted to die, taunted when I wanted to hold." Tears began to fall freely down my face now and Kai looked quite hurt for someone who never showed a shred of emotion. The sounds of the music behind me seemed to vanish, till all that was around was me and Kai.

"Did you really think that being nice to me would take us back to how it was before? Before when all we ever had was based on my lies and lust. Not that we ever had much..." I started sobbing loudly and held my head in my hands.

"Rei, don't do this to..."

"I'LL DO WHAT I LIKE!" I screamed. I swung my fist forward blindly- hitting Kai square in the jaw. Kai grunted and skidded back a little on the damp grass. He adjusted himself quickly and grabbed my wrists- holding them above my shoulders. His hands were clammy and his breath smelt strongly of vodka.

"You were always my friend, Rei..." I looked up at Kai who was inches away from me. His expression had become soft and calm, the beginnings of tears forming in his own eyes. I noticed how close his mouth was from mine- and how pink his lips were. I was shocked when the sight of those lips re-played the play-fight with Tala that morning in my head

"How can you trust me to do the right thing?" Kai dropped my wrists, sending my Alco-pop crashing to the floor. He almost looked disappointed, but I didn't understand why.

"I trust you. You're a good friend. My only friend really..."

"Why can't you just hate me and let me get over you? I can't stand this fantasy you seem to have of normality." I wiped my eyes and managed to stop crying.

"I don't really understand anything, or really what your problem even is- but I know I could never hate you." Kai actually wiped back a tear. "you're confusing me so much..." And with that, Kai ran back into the house, leaving me and his abandoned bottle of vodka, all alone...

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"Hey, babe, what are you doing out here all alone?"

"Drinking," I sighed and turned around. "And it's not babe. I'm a guy." I giggled drunkenly remembering that with my hair down, I did look like a girl from behind.

"Rei Kon?" He said sharply- almost threateningly. I could just about make out blonde hair and shorts, but I was too drunk to focus on his face. "As you look pretty shit-faced, I'm guessing you can't tell who I am, can you?"

"The tooth fairy?"

"No, it's not the fucking tooth fairy!" He snapped. "It's Miguel."

_Oh crap. He's gonna want revenge for Matilda, and I'm too pissed to fight back!_

"And apart from trying to pick me up before, what do you want?" I put my empty vodka bottle down and stood up in front of him so I could read his facial expression. He looked pretty angry...

"You don't even like her! Why would you do that? You knew we were dating!"

"Well, no, I don't like her, but then I honestly didn't know you two were dating." Miguel shifted awkwardly and jammed his hands in his pockets. "Tala said you'd broken up anyway- so why do you even care?"

"Why the hell should I tell you?" Miguel yelled looking away from me- his fists clenching in his pockets.

"Then don't tell me. See if I care..."

"She cheated on me," Miguel said softly. "Or- at least I thought she did."

"What happened?"

_I'm not gonnna get beaten up! Yay! There is a god!_

"We went to a bath house- you know- our team. Thought it would be a good holiday for us. We had a spring all to our selves but Matilda started to feel faint, so me and Aaron went to get her a drink- but when we came back..."

"Her and Claude?" I asked.

The music in the background seemed to start playing again, even though I knew it had been playing all this time. Miguel was looking at the ground, seeming rather hurt- so I automatically wrapped my arms around him. Miguel didn't move his arms to try and hug back, but I could tell he needed to be held.

"We came back and...he was on top. He had his hands on her bre...he was kissing her. I didn't think. I just dumped her a few days later. I never considered that she's just fainted and started to drown. Claude was just helping her...and I hurt him badly...and I must have hurt her badly too..."

"You love her?"

"So much..."

"If it helps..." I laughed and let go of him. "She called me Miguel the whole way through, she didn't even say sorry for it." Miguel blushed. "I know what it's like to be in love too. And she still loves you- a lot."

"Really? I've never seen you with a girl before? Who is she?" Miguel looked at me innocently for an answer- one which when I was drunk- I couldn't hold back.

"Kai." His eye's opened wide, but then he quickly tried to cover his shock. "I'm desperately in love with Kai."

"R-really?" Miguel's eyes shot about everywhere- apart from at me of course. "B-but...Kai's a guy."

"Yep."

"So t-then why do you...I mean...but you can't really...how can you...no, no, no...I don't mean like that, just like how...but...Rei! Kai is a guy!"

"Homophobic now, are we?" I couldn't help laughing watching Miguel squirm.

"No but, how can you like another guy like that?" I shrugged at him.

"Anyway, I better try and find Tala, he's propably dying in a bathroom somewhere by now...Thanks for sobering me up a little..."

"Don't mention it..." I walked towards the door only to stop when Miguel called back at me. "Hey, Rei. Were you her first time?"

_No. I wasn't..._

"Yep. Sorry, man."

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Just as I'd predicted, Tala was throwing up in the first toilet I came across.

"You're an idiot, Tala. Where the hell did you go off to?" I closed the door and locked it, after pushing some random drunk girl out first. "I haven't seen you all night, but you still managed to get shit-faced."

Tala raised his head out of the toilet to look me up and down, maybe to confirm that it was actually me. His eyes suddenly widdened and his face dropped back down into the toilet- gagging sounds following. I sat in the sink next to him, letting my hand dangle down onto his back.

"I spoke to Kai." Tala coughed a little- most likely from shock- and sat back up again.

"Kai's a bastard," Tala mumbled. "Always was- even when he was younger. I still don't get why someone like you could ever love a guy like him."

I didn't say anything back to that and just looked straight ahead- but not really seeing anything.

"But who am I fooling? Why would a guy like you, ever love a guy like me?" Tala dove forward and clutched the toilet again. I found myself rubbing his back. "It's not like there's anything about me you could ever love, is there, Rei?" Tala forced his head back and pushed my hand to one-side. He grabbed the towel rack, and very shakily, pulled himself up. We looked at each other in silence for a long time, and for some reason, I could hear wings flaping in my ears.

"Tala, I really do love you, but..."

"...but not like 'that', right? I'm your fucking brother, right, Rei?"

The music seemed to get slower and I became aware of every breath I drew. The alcohol in my system reared it's ugly head again, and I felt out of control and light-headed. The wings flaping in my ears kept getting louder.

"As well," I said gentally, fear seeping through. Tala raised an eyebrow. "Not as a brother. I love you as well." Tala slid back down the towel rack- sending a collection of towels flying over him. "I think I always have."

There was a loud hammering on the door and both of us jolted awake- completely sobered up. I noticed the music had stopped.

"Police are here. If you wanna spend a night together in jail- stay in there!" Came someones panicky voice.

"Shit. We better leave then."

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After escaping from the party, I bought Tala a coffee at a late night cafe, and we were forced to ride home again. The ride back with Tala was a lot different from the earlier ride. The headlights of cars going past were brighter and moved slower, creating lines of white and yellow across my vision. The sound of the Honda's engine was ghostly and felt like it was a long way away from me. My hands, arms and chest glowed with the warmth emitting from Tala- touching him for such a prolonged period of time had become intoxicating, and I was slowly getting more and more spent- wings flapping widely in my ears. The wings of butterflies or bats or angels or lust...

Tala pulled into the flat's car park and swung over the handle bars again- this time a lot slower. He took off his helmet- and then mine- and clipped them onto the saddle bag. Without a single word passing between us, he coaxed me off of the bike and picked me up.

He was still pretty drunk, so walking wasn't that easy, but I would never have let him put me down. He opened my flat's door and kicked back to close it again after we'd got inside.

Tala took me into my bedroom and lay me down on the bed, letting himself kneel over me.

"Rei, I love you. I've always lo..." I grabbed his shirt and pulled him down onto me.

Our lips gentally rubbed together, needing the contact between each others skin like never before. Tala slid a hand up the side of my chest, runching up my shirt- uncovering my trembling skin. His tounge slowly developed the kiss into something more, and I found myself moaning softly, gripping his back tightly.

Tala slid both of his hands around my back and pulled me closer to him, making my whole torso leave the sheets- supported purely by Tala. My hands despratly ran along his back- his shirt already far up his chest- and the skin contact felt fulfilling. It seemed a lot of sexual tension between us was finally being satisfied.

Tala lay me back down again and broke off the kiss. He sat up across my hips- and started to un-do the buttons on my shirt.

"I'll run away with you," I gasped huskily. "I'll be your lover."

Tala opened the shirt up and smoothed his hands over my chest. "I love you."

"I love you too, Tala." A hand lazily traced its way down my chest. "Please don't tease..."

"As you wish, master."

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...That was a very long chapter... .drops head onto keyboard... Loads to explain...

The 'flapping wings' thing is something I get when I'm around someone I'm really sexually attracted to. As my heart will beat faster, blood pumps around my body- and past my ears- a lot quicker. This creates a humming sound, similar to flapping wings, in my ears. You might get it to, but never really have noticed it before. I've given Rei the same thing as I think it's a good reaction to desire.

At one point Miguel asks Rei, "..how can you like another guy like that?". I actually got asked this once myself- apart from 'girl'- and I remember it really upset me at the time. But now homophobic people don't bother me- because I believe that I'm gonna love whoever I fall in love with and not care about their gender. Love is more powerful that expectations and rules.

Hope you enjoyed this chapter, and please tell me what you think!


	8. X DAY!

Last chapter! I'm sorry this is so late, but the new mini-computer which was making my chapters longer, was also the same one to DELETE ALL MY DOCUMENTS FOR NO REASON! So this is the second version of the last chapter, as the first is stuck somewhere.

Also, yesterday I bought the best manga I've read in a very long time, and I feel it's my duty to introduce other people to it. It's a tokyopop one called Off Beat. To check it out, go to tokyopop dot com and look for Off Beat in the books menu!

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Sunlightcascaded in through the open curtains, and draped over the bed in which me and Tala lay in silence. I could tell he was awake- and that he knew I was too- but neither of us moved or broke the silence.

We were afraid of what we'd done. I kind of knew it was going to happen one day- as we're the only two homosexuals among us. However, I still felt guilty. There was a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach, and I wasn't sure how to get rid of it.

Kai still had his claws in me. Claws which he had poisoned...

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Sunday- X-DAY

"Are you feeling better?" Tala asked as I walked out of the toilet. I ran my hand over my mouth in an attempt to dispose of any visible vomit. "You've been sick?"

I stood a few paces in front of Tala, who was sitting down eating breakfast. A few newly heated pop tarts where on a plate at my seat, which Tala had made like normal. But this didn't feel normal at all.

"Rei? Are you ill? I can get pills..."

"I'm fine." I lied. Kai's comment a few days ago seemed to make more and more sense.

"You're not! Is it because of what I've done? I'm sorry, I was selfish to do that so soon..."

Tala was actually right. My thighs felt sticky and unpleasant, and my whole body felt invaded. It was kinda painful to walk, and this feeling alone kept making me throw up. I suddenly felt guilty for ever sleeping with a girl if this is what they too felt like in the morning.

"I've just got a hang over, Tala. Stop worrying about me. I'm fine." I sat down and ate my pop tarts. Tala smiled at me across the table.

"Tonight, we'll be going to bed in Tokyo, in our own flat. No world championships. No school. No rules." He took his plates over to the sink. "We'll be free, Rei."

I took a sip of the milk Tala hadn't picked up, and closed my eyes.

I was going to be free. No more razor-eyes or false-friends. Just me and Tala and the world.

The world was going to be just for us now.

"I need to go and say goodbye to my team and pick-up stuff from our flat." Tala flung his jacket over him. "I'll be a few hours maximum."

"I guess I'll go say bye to Kai then..."

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Max opened the door slowly, but once he saw it was me, flung his arms around me.

"Hey everyone! Rei's come back!" Max shouted. Tyson, Kenny and Hilary ran out of the living room to greet me.

"Yo, Rei! Great to have you back, man!" Tyson yelled happily. Max let go, allowing Tyson to pat me on the shoulder warmly.

"I'm not coming back," I said coldly. "I just want to talk to Kai."

"Yo, Kai! Get your arse down here." Tyson turned back to me and added. "Do you want us to leave?" He gave me a different look from Hilary, Max and Kenny- who all looked puzzled. I suddenly remembered that Tyson had seen me pull Tala away from Hilary, and wondered weather he thought I was gay.

"That's all right. You're gonna hear about this sooner or later anyway, so it's better you hear it from my mouth first."

"Are you sure? Kai told me..." Tyson whispered.

My eyes widened for a brief moment, but then it was unfair of me to expect Kai to keep to himself forever. I just never considered that he'd tell any one.

"I'm not gonna to talk about that..." I said. Kai had begun to timidly walk down the stairs. "I'm saying goodbye."

Kai stopped walking when I said 'goodbye', and the others erupted into a loud murmur. I looked over all of them and meet eyes with Kai, who looked taken back.

"Goodbye?" Kai repeated. "Why? Where are you going?"

Max started to say something, only to be hit by Tyson. For the first time- I respected Tyson's intuition.

"I'm going to Tokyo."

"Why?" Hilary burst out.

"I'm going with Tala..."

"But why Tala? When did you two become such great friends?" Kai said, his voice getting louder. "He's making you throw your life away for a relationship that's only gonna last a few days!"

A lot calmer, Max asked, "But we're your friends too, right? Why don't you want to stay with us?"

"Tala's not my friend..."

"Then why are you gonna move with him?" Yelled Kenny.

"...Tala's my lover." I said. There was a pause- the only sound was the harsh in take of breath. Tyson looked down disappointedly, Hilary clasped her hands over her mouth, Max smiled for a while- and then started to laugh wildly, Kenny stood still with his mouth open, and Kai looked horrified.

"Since when? When did you start...sleeping...with him?" Kai muttered through the atmosphere. Max started laughing even more when Kai said this, so Tyson pushed everyone else out the door behind me.

"Since yesterday. I realized something at the party, and now we're together." I said, resenting Kai a great deal.

Kai didn't say anything back to that, so I turned to leave.

"No. Wait a minute. I need to know something before you go." He asked desperately. I didn't turn around, but stayed still so he knew I was listening.

"Why do you..." He cut himself off. "Are you really gay?"

"That's the big important question? I'm leaving..."

"No, it's not. I mean...you really don't just see me as a friend?"

"I told you I loved you, didn't I?" I snapped back, pissed off with his slowness.

"So, we couldn't ever be friends again?"

"For god sakes, Kai! No!" I yelled.

"Why not? I don't mind that you love me...I mean, it was weird at first, but now I'm kinda glad that a person like you fell in love with someone like me."  
"What would you do if I was a girl?"

"Go out with you I guess."

"THEN WHY NOT NOW?" I shouted, turning back to look at him. "What difference does it make weather I'm a guy or a girl? I still love you so much! Are you saying that because I'm the same gender as you, my love isn't even worth considering?"

"I'm not gay, Rei."

"So fucking what? If you're pleased I love you and that you'd go out with me if I were a girl, what difference does being a boy make?" I noticed I was crying, which didn't seem to shock me anymore. "I don't expect to get fucked by you, if that's what you mean!"

"That's not what I mean..." Kai regained his control. "You're not trying to understand me."

"Neither are you!" I suddenly realized there was no hope, and begging like this wasn't fair on Tala. "Bye then."

Kai never said anything in reply- not that I'd waited anyway- so I quickly left, tears creeping down my face unwantedly. I met Kenny, Max , Hilary and Tyson outside, who all looked shocked that I was crying. Hilary flung herself onto me and started to sob into my shoulder.

"You don't have to go, Rei. Kai just doesn't understand what he's feeling." Tyson had never struck me as the type of person to except homosexuality so quickly, but I was so grateful that he did. "Please stay, or Kai's gonna sulk for months!"

"Tyson's right, Rei. Kai will never let us forget that we let you go!" Max mused for a while. "Hey, do you think Kai likes Rei? I mean he's been extra pissed off ever since Rei left."

"Don't go, Rei!" Hilary cried. "We don't care that you're gay, so why do you want to leave us behind?"

"You shouldn't ask questions you don't want to here the answers to." I pulled away from Hilary, who was still sobbing. "Goodbye."

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Tala was waiting for me when I got back home. He'd packed all of my things up into a rucksack and suitcase, which waited by the side of the door. He had a large sports bag over one shoulder and his guitar over the over.

"Why are you bringing your guitar?" I asked picking up my things.

"Well, I thought that if we can't get jobs for a while, I could busk or something." Tala laughed and stood up. "I sold the bike."

"My god! We really must be going!"

Tala slipped his shoes on and we both left the flat. I looked back at the closed and battered door, and sighed. That flat had seen a lot of memories I'd like to forget, but also a large number of memories I wanted to last forever.

But whatever that flat meant to me, it would always be where I fell in love with Tala.

"Tala."

"What?"

"Kiss me."

"Any particular reason?"

"Yes," I said embracing him, letting my bags drop to the ground. "Because you can."

Tala locked his lips over mine and I pulled myself closer to him.

"You've got what you wanted then. You got your fairy tale ending." I smiled and picked up my bags again. "We pulled though all the hardships and the tests, and we both ended up with the guy."

"Now I have you, I'm not going to let anything spoil it for us." Tala said softly.

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

"Kai! You have to go after him!" Yelled Tyson. "If you don't, you'll regret it for the rest of your life!"

"Come on Kai! You said yourself that you love him!" Hilary said, who was on the floor begging.

"We don't care if you're gay!" Tyson pleaded.

"For the last time! I'm not gay! There's just something about Rei, there always has been..." Kai said defensively.

"Yo, that's called a chrush. Having a chrush on a guy makes you gay. Don't kid yourself, Kai." Max laughed.

"Shut up, Max! You're not helping!"

"Hey, back in America being gay is a good enough reason to kill somebody! I can't believe you two are actually _telling _Kai to be gay."

"You're an idiot Max!" Screamed Hilary. "If you fell in love with a girl, and then she had a sex change over night, are you saying that you would suddenly stop loving her?"

"I wouldn't know, I've never been in love!"

"Yeah, you know what! It shows!" Hilary sighed in an attempt to calm herself down. "Kai, what are you affraid of? You both love each other! Why on earth don't you want to be happy?"

"I'm not affraid, I'm just not giving in..."

"What?" Tyson yelled.

"Rei may have given in, so has Tala, but I won't. I'm not going to let these unatural feelings control me. I'm not going to let them take over. I shouldn't _like _another guy, Max is right, it's sick. I gave in once and nearly kissed him. I was so sickened that he loved me. Rei never even tryed to control himself, he wasn't even ashamed! He let his sick desires take over, and I'll be damned if I do the same!"

Tyson hit Kai about the same time Hilary slapped him.

"You arrogent bastard! You've been lying to Rei about wanting to be 'just' friends!" Screamed Hilary. "You're gonna be miserable for the rest of your life for some crappy Christian ideal? What is so evil about homosexuality?"

"It's sick and wrong," Max interjected.

"Shut the fuck up, Tate! And piss off!" Tyson shouted. "You and your homophobia can have a fucking parrade for all I care!"

"Oh, you wanna go outside?" Snapped Max.

"Stop fighting!" Kenny yelled from across the room. "We aren't getting anywhere like this!" He stood up and walked over to join the conversation. "At the end of the day, Rei has gone off with Tala rather than continuing to try and gain Kai's affections, which it turns out, he already had. If Rei still wanted to be with Kai, he would still be here." The whole room fell silent. "Rei isn't interested in you Kai, so that solves your problem. In a few hours he'll be in Tokyo and you'll never see him again." Kai swallowed hard. "If it wasn't for your 'ideals', Rei would still be here- maybe even going out with you! But you just had to pretend you felt nothing but friendship, and drive Rei away!" Kenny was actually shaking. "You deserve all the pain you're gonna feel which comes from his absence!"

"I'll go then." Kai bit back tears."You're right. You're all right. Well, not Max..."

"Kai, you won't make it now..." Kenny started.

"No. I know it's too late today." Kai smiled. "But there's always the holidays..."

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

The train flew along the tracks as Tala and I sat in our empty carrage. Rain fell softy onto the closed windows, and it was already dark outside.

Tala un-zipped his gutiar case and placed the gutiar across his lap.

"I haven't written anything new since we got together, so the only songs I know are sad." Tala confessed.

"I don't mind." I sighed. "I've just never heard you play- let alone sing!"

Tala smiled and said sorry again. I was actually slightly curious as to what Tala would have written.

**"Maybe when I'm older and my heart has become bolder-**

**I'll capture your hand and take you to my tower,**

**I'll slip off your shirt and pull down your skirt,**

**And lay with you for ever."**

I felt my eyes slowly close, and a smile curled onto my lips.

_'Skirt'? He must have wrote this one with Bryan then..._

**"Maybe when I'm older and my heart has become bolder-**

**I won't need to hide and lie about how I feel,**

**I'll kiss your face and watch your grace,**

**Without being resented."**

"We're both older now." Tala put the gutiar back and watched me sleep. "I'm taking you to my tower, and we're gonna lay there forever."

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

THE END!

I know the real fariy tale ending would have been Rei and Kai getting together, but I wanted to keep things believable. This story has been quite important for me to write because I've worked a lot of things out in my head about some of the people I know, and people I no longer know.

I tried to keep to the charicters cultural background in this story, which is why most of them have a different opinion on being gay. Tyson, Hilary and Kenny all come from Japan, so they have grown up excepting it happens, (ie. yaoi manga/anime! lol). Rei is from China, where no body likes to talk about it, even if they know it's happening. Tala and Kai are both from Russia, where homosexuality was only made legal when communism fell, so not many Russians except it, and can be quite _harsh_ to people that are. And most importantly, Max is from America, where peoples opinion changes from state to state, and from school to school- but Max brings in the most important aspect- the 'crappy Christian ideal'.

Anyway- I'm considering doing a sequel, in which Kai goes up to Toyko in his school holidays to visit Rei- and maybe even try to steal him back- so could you please let me know what you think about this?

But yeah, maybe I've even changed some opinions of your own? lol, doubt it- but I can hope. Thanks for reading and please lt me know what you think!


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